home *** CD-ROM | disk | FTP | other *** search
- POSTCARD FROM CAMP: "DEAR MOM AND
- DAD, DON'T TOUCH THIS CARD - I
- HAVE POISON IVY."
- --ALAN KING
-
-
- INSANITY IS HEREDITARY - YOU CAN
- GET IT FROM YOUR CHILDREN.
- --SAM LEVENSON
-
-
-
- AT BLOOD BANK: "DONATE NOW! DON'T
- LET US BE CAUGHT WITH OUR PINTS
- DOWN."
- --CATHOLIC DIGEST
-
-
- SNOW IS THE PEANUT BUTTER OF
- NATURE. IT'S CRUNCHY, KIDS LOVE
- IT, AND IT CLINGS TO THE ROOF
- OF YOUR HOUSE.
- --LOS ANGELES TIMES
-
- ONE COUPLE COULDN'T AFFORD A
- WINTER VACATION THIS YEAR.
- HOWEVER, THEY DID SAVE ENOUGH
- TO TURN UP THE THERMOSTAT FOR
- A WEEKEND.
- --CHANGING TIMES
- YOU KNOW YOU'VE REACHED MIDDLE AGE
- WHEN YOUR WEIGHT LIFTING CONSISTS
- MERELY OF STANDING UP.
- --BOB HOPE
-
-
- SPRING IS ALMOST HERE. ALREADY THE
- TREES ARE STARTING TO BLOSSOM WITH
- KITES.
- --BILL VAUGHAN
-
-
- HIS IDEA OF LIFE IN THE FAST LANE
- IS GOING THROUGH THE EXPRESS
- CHECKOUT WITH A CAN OF PRUNE
- JUICE.
- --JAMES UNGER
-
- WIFE TO HUSBAND: "I THINK YOU
- OUGHT TO GO TO THE DOCTOR. OTHER
- MEN DON'T COME HOME TOO TIRED TO
- ARGUE."
- --ED REED
-
- MONA LISA COCKTAIL - TWO OF THEM
- AND YOU CAN'T GET THE SILLY GRIN
- OFF YOUR FACE.
- --ERIC TRACY
-
-
- MUM'S THE WORD - CHRYSANTHEMUM IS
- TOO DIFFICULT TO SPELL.
- --THE OFFICE ECONOMIST
-
-
-
- THERE IS A TIME TO TAKE COUNSEL OF
- YOUR FEARS, AND THERE IS A TIME TO
- NEVER LISTEN TO ANY FEAR.
- --GEN. GEORGE S. PATTON
-
-
- OUR FAULTS IRRITATE US MOST WHEN
- WE SEE THEM IN OTHERS.
- --PENNSYLVANIA DUTCH PROVERB
-
-
-
- IF YOU WANT TO RECAPTURE YOUR
- YOUTH, JUST CUT OFF HIS ALLOWANCE.
- --AL BERNSTEIN
-
-
-
- PARENTS NEVER FULLY APPRECIATE
- TEACHERS UNLESS IT RAINS ALL
- WEEKEND.
- --BOB GODDARD
-
-
- ADVERSITY IS THE TRIAL OF
- PRINCIPLE. WITHOUT IT, A MAN
- HARDLY KNOWS WHETHER HE IS
- HONEST OR NOT.
- --HENRY FIELDING
-
- HE DOES NOT SEEM TO ME TO BE A
- FREE MAN WHO DOES NOT SOMETIMES
- DO NOTHING.
- --CICERO
-
-
- ONE OF THE VERY NICEST THINGS
- ABOUT LIFE IS THE WAY WE MUST
- REGULARLY STOP WHATEVER IT IS
- WE ARE DOING AND DEVOTE OUR
- ATTENTION TO EATING.
- --LUCIANO PAVAROTTI
- GOD IS LIKE A MIRROR. THE MIRROR
- NEVER CHANGES BUT EVERYBODY WHO
- LOOKS AT IT SEES SOMETHING
- DIFFERENT.
- --RABBI HAROLD KUSHNER
-
- IF A MAN EMPTIES HIS PURSE INTO
- HIS HEAD, NO MAN CAN TAKE IT
- AWAY FROM HIM. AN INVESTMENT IN
- KNOWLEDGE ALWAYS PAYS THE BEST
- INTEREST.
- --BENJAMIN FRANKLIN
- SMALL ILLS ARE THE FOUNTAINS OF
- MOST OF OUR GROANS. MEN TRIP NOT
- ON MOUNTAINS, THEY STUMBLE ON
- STONES.
- --CHINESE PROVERB
-
- WE GIVE UP LEISURE IN ORDER THAT
- WE MAY HAVE LEISURE, JUST AS WE
- GO TO WAR IN ORDER THAT WE MAY
- HAVE PEACE.
- --ARISTOTLE
-
- ACQUIRE NEW KNOWLEDGE WHILST
- THINKING OVER THE OLD, AND YOU
- MAY BECOME A TEACHER OF OTHERS.
- --CONFUCIUS
-
-
- JOURNALISTS DO NOT LIVE BY WORDS
- ALONE, ALTHOUGH SOMETIMES THEY
- HAVE TO EAT THEM.
- --ADLAI E. STEVENSON
-
-
- OUR PROGRESS AS A NATION CAN BE
- NO SWIFTER THAN OUR PROGRESS IN
- EDUCATION.
- --JOHN F. KENNEDY
-
-
- WYVQUCAG RAYS UCSW: "GHCA SYS CIG
- GCG, GYI'Q QYTUX QXOV UCAG - O
- XCEH WYOVYI OEL."
-
-
-
- NGMOGNBZ NM FVXVWNBOXZ - ZKE IOG
- YVB NB LXKC ZKEX IFNAWXVG.
-
-
-
-
- WH JPIIO JWAY: "OIAWHL AIN! OIA'H
- PLH SU JL VWSMRH NQHR ISD CQAHU
- OINA."
-
-
-
- RKCL YR WZP DPXKOW AOWWPI CV
- KXWOIP. YW'R NIOKNZG, UYMR QCFP
- YW, XKM YW NQYKTR WC WZP ICCV
- CV GCOI ZCORP.
-
-
- ISM QILFYM QILYXS'A KVVIEX K
- UDSAME RKQKADIS ANDH BMKE.
- NIUMRME, ANMB XDX HKRM MSILTN
- AI ALES LF ANM ANMEJIHAKA VIE
- K UMMGMSX.
-
- WHC YEHZ WHC'UI GILFMIJ QTJJBI LKI
- ZMIE WHCG ZITKMX BTSXTEK FHERTRXR
- QIGIBW HS RXLEJTEK CO.
-
-
-
- AIQUZK UA LGXBAR OJQJ. LGQJLME ROJ
- RQJJA LQJ ARLQRUZK RB TGBAABX PURO
- FURJA.
-
-
-
- LNR NHGQ FM INMG NC SLG MQRS IQCG
- NR AFNCA SLVFPAL SLG GZJVGRR
- DLGDWFPS TNSL Q DQC FM JVPCG
- YPNDG.
-
-
- KBHQ ZY POEANSM: "B ZPBSL GYO
- YOXPZ ZY XY ZY ZPQ MYDZYJ. YZPQJ
- FQS MYS'Z DYFQ PYFQ ZYY ZBJQM ZY
- NJXOQ."
-
-
- FUVY HADY TUTSBYAH - BJU UR BCXF
- YVK OUE TYV'B ZXB BCX DAHHO ZGAV
- URR OUEG RYTX.
-
-
-
- WPW'B RLY VQGN - DLGUBOMRLYWPW ZB
- RQQ NZTTZDPER RQ BKYEE.
-
-
-
-
- EXAIA FC S EFWA EU ESOA NUTKCAD UL
- ZUTI LASIC, SKH EXAIA FC S EFWA EU
- KAGAI DFCEAK EU SKZ LASI.
-
-
-
- SIX TDINUO GXXGUDUA IO JSOU KZAQ
- KA OAA UZAJ GQ SUZAXO.
-
-
-
-
- CA XLF SJIG GL DZVJHGFDZ XLFD
- XLFGB, NFQG VFG LAA BCQ JYYLSJIVZ.
-
-
-
-
- BTNZPIM PZOZN XYWWK TBBNZLHTIZ
- IZTLFZNM YPWZMM HI NTHPM TWW
- CZZQZPR.
-
-
-
- WOQUZEDNS DE NGU NZDWV PJ
- BZDKMDBVU. IDNGPHN DN, W AWK
- GWZOVS CKPIE IGUNGUZ GU DE
- GPKUEN PZ KPN.
-
-
- QU RBUA YBF AUUZ FB ZU FB LU E
- GDUU ZEY TQB RBUA YBF ABZUFNZUA
- RB YBFQNYI.
-
-
-
- VKG VE LAG TGZX KBPGIL LABKWI
- UCVHL OBEG BI LAG DUX DG SHIL
- ZGWHOUZOX ILVN DAULGTGZ BL BI
- DG UZG YVBKW UKY YGTVLG VHZ
- ULLGKLBVK LV GULBKW.
-
- ORE DB WDJQ Y UDZZRZ. IFQ UDZZRZ
- TQAQZ XFYTOQB GSI QAQZPGREP NFR
- WRRJB YI DI BQQB BRUQIFDTO
- EDCCQZQTI.
-
-
- KL Q DQJ XDGFKXO VKO GZSOX KJFY
- VKO VXQC, JY DQJ BQJ FQPX KF
- QMQH LSYD VKD. QJ KJAXOFDXJF KJ
- PJYMTXCUX QTMQHO GQHO FVX WXOF
- KJFXSXOF.
-
- OYUZZ LZZO UCK WPK QNTHWULHO NQ
- YNOW NQ NTC ACNUHO. YKH WCLF HNW
- NH YNTHWULHO, WPKM OWTYSZK NH
- OWNHKO.
-
-
- PO NMTO GZ KOMVGUO MC WUSOU IEBI
- PO RBL EBTO KOMVGUO, QGVI BV PO
- NW IW PBU MC WUSOU IEBI PO RBL
- EBTO ZOBYO.
-
-
- WXFMGTS ASR JANRBSZIS RLGBOY
- YLGAJGAI NPST YLS NBZ, WAZ KNM
- DWK HSXNDS W YSWXLST NE NYLSTO.
-
-
-
- IMFJUSXOHCH KM UMC XORA WT YMJKH
- SXMUA, SXCZMFLZ HMPACOPAH CZAT
- ZSRA CM ASC CZAP.
-
-
-
- MBE HEMIEXWW YW Y LYRVML PYL QX
- LM WSVORXE RZYL MBE HEMIEXWW VL
- XGBPYRVML.
-
-
-
- ________ ____ ____: "____ ___ ___
- ___, ___'_ _____ ____ ____ - _
- ____ ______ ___."
-
-
-
- ________ __ __________ - ___ ___
- ___ __ ____ ____ ________.
-
-
-
-
- __ _____ ____: "______ ___! ___'_
- ___ __ __ ______ ____ ___ _____
- ____."
-
-
-
- ____ __ ___ ______ ______ __
- ______. __'_ _______, ____ ____
- __, ___ __ ______ __ ___ ____
- __ ____ _____.
-
-
- ___ ______ ______'_ ______ _
- ______ ________ ____ ____.
- _______, ____ ___ ____ ______
- __ ____ __ ___ __________ ___
- _ _______.
-
- ___ ____ ___'__ _______ ______ ___
- ____ ____ ______ _______ ________
- ______ __ ________ __.
-
-
-
- ______ __ ______ ____. _______ ___
- _____ ___ ________ __ _______ ____
- _____.
-
-
-
- ___ ____ __ ____ __ ___ ____ ____
- __ _____ _______ ___ _______
- ________ ____ _ ___ __ _____
- _____.
-
-
- ____ __ _______: "_ _____ ___
- _____ __ __ __ ___ ______. _____
- ___ ___'_ ____ ____ ___ _____ __
- _____."
-
-
- ____ ____ ________ - ___ __ ____
- ___ ___ ___'_ ___ ___ _____ ____
- ___ ____ ____.
-
-
-
- ___'_ ___ ____ - _____________ __
- ___ _________ __ _____.
-
-
-
-
- _____ __ _ ____ __ ____ _______ __
- ____ _____, ___ _____ __ _ ____ __
- _____ ______ __ ___ ____.
-
-
-
- ___ ______ ________ __ ____ ____
- __ ___ ____ __ ______.
-
-
-
-
- __ ___ ____ __ _________ ____
- _____, ____ ___ ___ ___ _________.
-
-
-
-
- _______ _____ _____ __________
- ________ ______ __ _____ ___
- _______.
-
-
-
- _________ __ ___ _____ __
- _________. _______ __, _ ___
- ______ _____ _______ __ __
- ______ __ ___.
-
-
- __ ____ ___ ____ __ __ __ __ _
- ____ ___ ___ ____ ___ _________
- __ _______.
-
-
-
- ___ __ ___ ____ ______ ______
- _____ ____ __ ___ ___ __ ____
- _________ ____ ________ __ __
- __ ___ _____ ___ ______ ___
- _________ __ ______.
-
- ___ __ ____ _ ______. ___ ______
- _____ _______ ___ _________ ___
- _____ __ __ ____ _________
- _________.
-
-
- __ _ ___ _______ ___ _____ ____
- ___ ____, __ ___ ___ ____ __
- ____ ____ ___. __ __________ __
- _________ ______ ____ ___ ____
- ________.
-
- _____ ____ ___ ___ _________ __
- ____ __ ___ ______. ___ ____ ___
- __ _________, ____ _______ __
- ______.
-
-
- __ ____ __ _______ __ _____ ____
- __ ___ ____ _______, ____ __ __
- __ __ ___ __ _____ ____ __ ___
- ____ _____.
-
-
- _______ ___ _________ ______
- ________ ____ ___ ___, ___ ___
- ___ ______ _ _______ __ ______.
-
-
-
- ___________ __ ___ ____ __ _____
- _____, ________ _________ ____
- ____ __ ___ ____.
-
-
-
- ___ ________ __ _ ______ ___ __
- __ _______ ____ ___ ________ __
- _________.
-
-
-
- 0
- 7
- 0
- 7
- 7
- 1
-